How Much Does Your Better Half Notice???

So this took place a long time ago, but it's a funny story to share none the less. I was newly married. My best friend was sharing a home with "The totally wrong guy" (hereafter referred to as "Dud" for short.) My husband, "Devo" for anonymity sake and I were to meet BFF and Dud for dinner one evening. BFF and I had been talking about what we were going to wear, and I mentioned that Devo wouldn't notice anyway so it really didn't matter. She said that Dud (for all his faults) would notice...because he always paid attention to appearances.

Now lets digress for a minute here. Lest you think I'm just going to be another wife using a blog to air all of her dirty laundry...let me say that Devo is the best thing (outside of our two kids) that's ever happened to me. He's the ultimate provider, involved father, keeper of secrets, trusted advisor, loving spouse, and devoted family man. I couldn't ask for anyone better to share this life with. He makes me laugh, he makes me proud, he drives me crazy, and he treats me right. In so many ways...he is detail oriented...his job, attention to finances, attention to football stats, heck...anything that truly interests him. But he is definitely NOT interested nor even really concerned with what I wear. Don't get me wrong, he definitely has opinions like "don't just wear plain t-shirts" or "I like your hair long", but really paying attention...let's just say he doesn't.

To some that may seem to be a dream. Theoretically I guess you could say I'm lucky. I could probably buy an entirely new wardrobe and he wouldn't notice. I could sneak in new shoes every week and he wouldn't even bat an eye. But, the flip side of that is that I could walk out of this house looking like a complete moron and he wouldn't say a word. In fact...it happened years ago, but I'll get to that in a moment.

Now my BFF, as I mentioned, was living with Dud. Dud was loud, obnoxious, rude, and condescending, but for all these faults I guess he had some endearing qualities that I was never privy to. Apparently one of these attributes was paying attention to how BFF looked. I guess he was complimentary. I hope so anyway. But BFF and I made a little wager to compare if Dud and Devo were really who we were describing. This particular night, we set up a little experiment. We might have even wagered a little money on it.

So...this is how it was to go. I was going to wear a casual knit top (yeah...probably one of the aforementioned tees) with jean shorts. But...instead of tennis shoes or sandals, I wore my white satin wedding heels. BFF was going to dress up a bit more. She wore a shirt and mini skirt. But...instead of pairing her outfit with heels, she was going to wear her basketball high tops from high school.

This is how it went down. I walked out of the bedroom of our apartment in my casual get up and fancy shoes. I made quite the show of strutting around the apartment gathering up my purse, my plastic bag holding my real shoes, etc. Devo said nothing. We left our apartment on the second floor, walked across all of the wooden planks to the stairwell with my heels catching in every other slat, and still nothing. Walked noisily along the concrete to the car. Nothing. Got in the car, crossed my legs, and waved my foot around. Still nothing. Drove 20 minutes to BFF and Dud's place. Never a word. As we pulled into the driveway and parked, I finally turned to Devo and said "Are you really going to let me go out in public like this?" He said "what...the shoes?" "I was kind of wondering why you were wearing those", he said.

We go on up to BFF's door. Dud answered. We go in and there's BFF in her mini skirt with very appropriate shoes on. I questioned why she didn't wear the high tops. She replied that she hadn't even walked out the bedroom door and Dud had already said "Why are you wearing those shoes with that outfit?" It was true. We really knew our men. Thankfully, if that's the only complaint I have with Devo, that's relatively minor (and can even be nice as I mentioned before). Just think...I could wear sweats to Tony's and Devo wouldn't care (though Tony's would!). And really...I find great comfort in the fact that Devo loves me for who I am. Not for what I wear or how I dress. He's happy to be with me no matter what kind of hair day I'm having, whether my outfit's too tight, or whether it's completely out of style. That's a pretty good thing for me to notice about him too. I'm a pretty lucky gal.

Oh...and on a final note. BFF did finally leave Dud and marry the other greatest guy on the planet. I think we're both pretty lucky, and I notice that we've been BFF's for over half our lives. Did I ever tell you how that friendship started? Maybe next blog!

Bullseye VS. Wally World

A blog fan told me to blog today, so blog I will...

I like to shop. I admit it. Really any kind of shopping, but somehow I end up at a store I'll call Bullseye at least once a week. (I'm new to blogging and don't want to call these stores by name and end up getting sued or anything, but I'm sure you'll be able to deduce them if you continue reading.) I love Bullseye. There was a time, when I was a kid, that I didn't love Bullseye. It was the second choice to Venture (which I can call out by name since it no longer exists). I'm not sure how it happened. Bullseye must employ a clever advertising and marketing team, but they now sit atop the retail food chain. They're the Frontenac of the discount retail stores. They're merchandise is stylish and hip. They have big name designers bringing reasonably priced merchandise to the commoners, and their customer service is great.

Now...to be fair...Wally World stores for the most part are clean and attractive. Most of the stores in my neck of the woods are newly remodeled and updated. They have lots of products at reasonable prices, polite greeters at the doors, and decent customer service as well. So why do I prefer to shop at the Bullseye? To be quite honest, it's all about the clientele.

I received an email today that many of you have probably seen. It was titled "You must experience these "Wally World" folks. Now though I can't say that I've ever witnessed people quite as atrocious as the ones in this email, I've had encountered my fair share of nut cases on most of my visits to Wally World. With the exception of the sweet old lady who was trying to avoid the remodeling going on at her own Wally World across the river, most people that I meet at Wally World are downright scary. From the excessively obese women, who with their carts make it impossible to pass (and I'm quite certain they'd beat me down if I tried) to the child abusers screaming at their 10 kids to "sit down and shut up", the caliber of people is unmatched. Have you been by the sporting goods section lately? I think I saw the Unibomber there (or is he in prison?). And what about the ladies who might be streetwalkers discussing (way too loudly) certain feminine products for itching (caused by who knows what)!! Did you happen down the aisle that should've been fumigated from the person who should've visited the bathroom before shopping? Is it just me who follows these people or have you all had these experiences?

Label them what you will...rednecks, hoosiers, ghetto...you can find them all at your local Wally World. You can find larger versions of them at their big box counterpart store, "Stans", as well. Have you ever noticed that the size of your waist is directly proportional to the size and amount of the muffins, butter tubs, and pies that you put into your cart. Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking a good bargain, but if you go to wholesale stores for dinner on samples, and/or to load your cart with heaping portions of junk food, you may have a problem...but I digress. (Another whole blog topic could compare "Stans" and "C-Co", but that's another day).

Let me know where your shopping loyalties lie. To each his own, but I think my store of choice is a real Bullseye. So grab your Mizrahi or Gaultier duds and meet me there!

Random takes on random topics...: Finish the lyrics...

Random takes on random topics...: Finish the lyrics...: "Well...we just got home from a trivia night. Pretty successful evening. Tied for 3rd, lost on our guess of the # we'd have right. We were..."

Finish the lyrics...

Well...we just got home from a trivia night. Pretty successful evening. Tied for 3rd, lost on our guess of the # we'd have right. We were overzealous by 9! (Good to have high expectations for yourself, right?) We also came home with a bunch of "wine and dine" fun...bottles of spirits to add to our bar and gift certificates to restaurants as well as a Mizzou volleyball package. Very successful night.

So...what's the problem...

Though I rocked...literally...on a "finish the lyrics" category, I learned that I sing some...okay a lot...of lyrics wrong. I bet I'm not alone. So here...give it a try. I'm going to try to remember some of tonight's examples, but feel free to quiz us on your own!

B'52's "Love Shack"..

Bang, bang, bang on the door baby

Bang, bang on the door

Bang, bang, babg on the door baby

Bang bang

You're what....____ ______ ________!

(I messed that one up good!)

How about Meatloaf's "Paradise by the Dashboard Lights"

And now our bodies are oh so close and tight,

It never felt so good, it never felt so right,

____ ____ ________ ____ ___ ______ ____ ____ _____ ___ _ _____

(I had at least 3 words wrong on that.)

Oh well...I sure had fun singing them right or wrong...tell me you feel my pain. At least I made for some good laughs tonight. As I do quite often!!

Are You Busy???

Well another school year has begun. With that, theoretically, should come more time to accomplish things for us "stay at home" moms. Even for those of you "working" moms who no longer have to pack swim clothes, sunscreen, lunch and the multitude of other items needed for the various "camps" your kids went to over the summer. So then...why do we still feel so busy??

I think that's just the pace of our society today. We all run around nonstop trying to check everything off of our various to-do lists while not forgetting any of the appointments and plans on our i-cals, day planners and good old trusty wall calendars. So which of the following camps do you fall into? (I'm speaking mostly to moms here, though we could categorize men, singles, retirees, etc. in much the same way!)

Mom 1...You're the full blown, type A, overachiever. You probably work full time at a law firm giving 60 or so hours a week while still managing to parent your 2 kids, drive carpool, and serve as president of the PTO. You're the one that makes the rest of us feel like we need to hurry up and get our act together. You have reason to sit down and doze off at midnight while trying to catch up on "Mad Men".

Mom 2...You work full or maybe part time. You do your best at your job. You try to make it to all the activities at your kids school and most of their sporting events, but you're constantly stressed. You'd like to help out at school or church, but there's no way you could squeeze one more thing into your day. You get your stuff done at home so that you can relax and watch your shows at night, but that's it. End of story.

Mom 3...You also work full or part time, do your best at your job, and try to get to everything your kids do. You manage to also serve on committees at school, volunteer in your community, and make time for things like an occasional walk or a yoga class, but you often feel that you're letting things drop. It's so hard to give 100% at work and at home, but you keep on trying. Sometimes you wish you didn't have to work, but you also worry that you'd feel like you weren't as valuable if not for your job.

Mom 4...You are a "stay at home" mom, but you're rarely in your house. You're up at school helping in your kid's class, working the library, selling pencils for the Stu Co store, or eating lunch with your child. Or maybe you're at Bible study, helping out at a food pantry, taking care of an elderly parent or neighbor, or training for a triathalon. You're often running around the kids of Mom 1 or 2 or maybe even letting out their dog while they're at work. Doesn't leave you near enough time to clean house or make dinner. And look...it's time to get the kids already! Sometimes you'd like a job so that you'd have an excuse to say no to everything else.

Mom 5...You are a true "stay at home" mom. You help out once in a while outside the home, but mostly you are at home planning meals, cooking meals, and freezing meals. Your house is always tidy and your laundry is always caught up. You're probably well versed in daytime t.v. which is your companion as you fold clothes, iron, and organize closets. Your gifts are always bought and wrapped months in advance, and you pride yourself in your ability to keep your home in order. But sometimes you wonder if another kind of busy would be more...exciting?!?

No matter which mom you identify the most with, I'm betting that you feel busy and stressed a large portion of your day. What is it that you would most like to spend time on that's being neglected? For me it's my scrapbooking. I'm only a mere 5 years behind. I tried to schedule a Friday night last September for some friends and daughters to do it together, but guess what...we were too busy. Here it is almost a year later. I'm going to grab my calendar and try to pick a date. What are you going to do??

A Quick Note About Camping

Dear people who like to camp,

Please tell me what it is that draws you to camping, for I feel that I'm missing something?!! Is it the joy of laying tarp and constructing your own rudimentary shelter which blocks out little noise or bugs and lacks all the modern amenities such as toilets and air conditioning? Is it the feeling of constructing said tent while sweat beads trickle down your nose and off your face, ooze through your pores til all layers of clothing and undergarments are drenched, or the mixture of sweat and bug spray which creates a fine new cologne of some sort?

Is it sitting under the stars, away from the city, and listening to the sounds of all of God's creations (because that part almost got me), until I retired to my "home away from home" only to realize that I needed to visit the shower house (i.e. restroom) again, but missed the opportunity before the 4-5 hour steady rain began to fall. So...it must be the feeling of accomplishment when you "pull an all nighter" purely because you couldn't go to sleep for the sound of the rain continually reminded you of how badly you needed to pee?!? Once I decided to make the drive to the aforementioned bathhouse, I pondered if this is what you love? Sharing facilities with cicadas, roaches, moths, flies, gnats and every other flying creature known to man. Is that it??

Or perhaps what you love most is the sun rising as your natural alarm clock? Or setting off for a float trip with your family, friends, and many interesting "neighbors". Maybe reading each of their tattoos? Counting their missing teeth? Watching how many of them float drunk and alone with their personal floatation device while yelling obscenities at your children (or their imaginary friends), or float drunk and not alone yelling obscenities at each other. Maybe it's the success of helping said rowdies find their long lost drunk floating buddy whom they'd left alone to fend off the vicious rocks attacking his "nuts" and the logs that strapped him in place while we were reminded of "just keep swimming, just keep swimming" in Finding Nemo.

Or...maybe it's the chance to learn how well you and your spouse handle challenges like twisting through rapids and falling out of your canoe, or getting stuck on logs and watching each other try to create strategies for navigating off the invisible obstacle. Or...watching the domestic disputes taking place in canoes that pass you by (probably stemming from similar sticky situations that we found ourselves in.

Or lastly...maybe it's the chance to hang out with friends in a different environment, spend time away from the t.v., phones, and devices that won't get a signal there anyway, and just be one with nature. Yeah...I guess that works for some of you. However, unless I hear some really persuasive arguments...I'm going on the theory that there are people made for camping and people who are not. The person who got an hour of sleep and is now heading off to shower in the comfort of my home before jumping into my pillowtop mattressed bed, in my air conditioned home (pretty much bug free I hope) is not one of them. I tried it. I can check it off my list, I enjoyed the company of our traveling friends, but with all due respect...won't be doing that again anytime soon!!